Whoops, Bang, Ouch.

In "Put Out the Fire," Queen's ode to the murder of John Lennon, Freddie Mercury sang:

Guns don't kill people.
People kill people.
People with guns.



Dummy.

'Tis Not the Season

Yesterday, a store employee was killed during the rush of consumerism called "Black Friday." I get it, I understand it; but I choose not to participate in it. What have we done that Thanksgiving now officially gives way to Black Friday? What kind of world is it where people get to the mall at 5:00 AM to face rabid crowds and "beat the rush"?

The altar of commerce has taken a human sacrifice. Probably not the first, surely not the last.

In a world that puts up a stink saying "it's time we put Christmas back into Happy Holidays" I believe the Lord would rather us put Christ back into Christmas.

How 'bout Them Hogs!?!

Well, I was shocked to see the Razorbacks pull out a 31-30 victory in the "Battle for the Boot," truly amazed.

Frankly, the Hogs looked great while the Bayou Bengals looked lousy in the 1st and 4th quarters. In the 2nd and 3rd it was vice versa. In the end, the difference came down to one missed field goal in the first quarter and a boat load of penalties in the final quarter by LSU.

Casey Dick looked great in the second half, unfortunately by that time, it looked like some sections of War Memorial Stadium were looking a little light. (Whoops go the fair weather fans!)

In the end, the Hogs end the season 5-7, beating two ranked teams (Auburn and Tulsa-LSU wasn't ranked but were close) and losing to teams they should have beaten (Mississippi State, Kentucky).

I am still a Huston Nutt fan, but I believe Bobby Petrino was reamed by the national media last year coming to Arkansas. This year's team did better than I expected, which is why nobody trusts me to pick their holiday bowl pool anymore. That and a really bad showing in 1988.

Consistency is an issue, whether against teams they should beat (Miss St) or quarter to quarter (LSU). They have the blocks to build upon for the future and I hope they do.

Skip, I hope you stayed for the whole game!

image copyright Arkansas Athletics

American Politics... or The Same Thing Only Different

Last night Gov. Sarah Palin was on the Greta Van Susteren show talking about the election, the post-election and the media. The Govenor complained, and rightly so, that her campaign was marred by comments and questions that had nothing to do with her candidacy, but were focused on her gender.

When this was being said, the first thing that came to my mind is that US Represenative Geraldine Ferraro said the same things 24 years ago when she was the Democratic candidate for the Vice Presidency.

On the other side of the coin, President-Elect Barack Obama ran his campaign on private money because he got all the private money he needed and more. Since his war chest was as big as a whale he did not have to take Federal Election Commission funds and be bound by the restrictions that entails. The Republicans objected to this, especially since 1) he agreed to take the federalmoney with the strings attached and 2) Senator McCain and the Republicans had to take the public money with its restrictions.

The first thing that came to my mind with this is that this is the same objection Democrats have made against Republicans since I can remember. The Democratic party candidate has never had as much money as the Republican...until this year.

Can we all agree not to use either of these arguments ever again since both parties have used them against the other; and due to the inherent hypocracy that makes them no longer credible?

Oh, we can't? Sorry, I'll blog about football on Saturday.

Happy Thanksgiving

I am thankful. It has been a tough year for us here at Chez Andresen. Marie lost her job. Her health hasn't always been great. I've spent so much time arguing with the insurance company, two hospitals, and the on-line pharmacy that it has become my second job.

Still I am thankful.

I am grateful God loves me like a child and I am grateful that God has trusted me to be her husband. I am a child of God, a man, a husband, a son, a brother, a pastor, a minister, a preacher. And I thank God she loves me.

For this, I am thankful.

Perls of Wisdom

Father of Gestalt Therapy Fritz Perls once wrote...

To suffer one's own death and be reborn is very difficult.

You said it brother. Not bad for an athiest.

Inflation with Three More Zeroes

Yesterday, a retired banker and I were having a conversation about the bailout of Chase on the heals of the big bailout. He said, "A billion here and a billion there..."

He was making an allusion to the old saying, "A million here and a million there and after a while it adds up to real money." When did this get multiplied by a thousand?

Sore Losers

I was reading on AOL that Hillary Clinton may not be eligible to serve as Secretary of State. As interesting (or not) as that was, it was the comments on the story that got my attention:

Jackie 5:34PM Nov 24th 2008
Why shouldn't secretary of State be ineligible we already have a President elect who is ineligible to be an American President. Born in the USA he is obviously not or he would have proved it by now.

IMA GROUCH 5:34PM Nov 24th 2008
While we're talking about ineligibility, what about the Supreme Court ordering Obama to deliver to them a vault copy of his birth certificate by December 1 to show he is eligible to be president. The Supreme Court regards their power very sacred and if Obama ignores this request, or fails to produce the vault copy then the court could rule him ineligible to be president. Then what?????

Wow, there's grasping at straws. As conspiracy theories go, this is a good one. But let me ask--Wouldn't every Obama opponent since Law Review looked into his place of birth? It would have come up in state races, it would have come up in the Senate race, and surely everyone from Hillary to W has covered this angle. If he were not born in America, Bill O'Reilly would have done a remote from a little grass shack long, long ago.

Another consipracy theory I heard dealing with "the games media played to get Barack Obama elected" was that "The Cosby Show" was released for syndication and cable outlets to "so Americans wouldn't be scared to vote for Obama." Oh my God!

But you know, there is a grain of truth in this. The problem with the logic is that it's over twenty years too late. If Bill Cosby did anything to make Americans less afraid of voting for an African-American with his TV show, he did it in the 1980's, not in 2008. That was when the opinions of voters my age were being cast.

If this is a consipracy, it must have been developed when Barack Obama was in college. Wait a second, where were Barack Obama and Bill Cosby in 1982? I smell a conspiracy! There is something rotten going on here! I bet there was no such person as Fat Albert either--AND HE WAS MY HERO!

Sometimes this country needs to take a nice hot bath and relax.

Thanksgiving Worship/Giving Thanks

This evening, the Berryville Ministerial Alliance held its annual Thanksgiving service. This year, it was at the Chapel at the Little Portion Hermitage northeast of Eureka Springs. John Michael Talbot led worship.

It was a wonderful service filled with praise and glory to the Lord our God and Creator--shared by Presbyterians, Methodists, Church of Christ/Disciples, the members of the Community of Christ, Nazarenes, and Roman Catholics. It was a glorious service and a glorious shared experience.

JMT did open with a story because he broke his microphone right before the homily. He told the story of an old Bishop and a well practiced liturgy. As he tried to begin worship, he noticed the mic was broken. Instead of saying the usual "May the peace of Christ be with you all" he said "There's something wrong with this microphone." The assembly responded "And also with you."

In his homily, he noted the many people who will be challenged this year because of the economy, local and nation wide. This is a time to show that as the people of God we are called to give thanks to God by responding to our neighbors in this time of need.

In my words, we are the instruments of how God will redeem the pain and suffering caused by greed.

This year, as usual, the offering went to the Loaves and Fishes Food Bank of the Ozarks, specifically toward Christmas meals for 500 families. You can give to Loaves and Fishes at:

Loaves and Fishes Food Bank of the Ozarks
301 Bunch Springs Road
P. O. Box 149
Berryville AR 72616-0149
870.423.4246

The Wisdom of William Sloane Coffin

"Had Jesus heeded both his parents and the religious authorities of his day, instead of saving the world he would have become the best carpenter in Nazareth. Were our chldren to heed us and the religious authorities of our day, they'd all become nicely packaged citizens--safe, polite, and obedient."

This pearl comes from "Credo" by William Sloane Coffin (Westminster John Knox Press, 2004, page 131). Coffin was Head of Staff at the Riverside Church in New York City during a tumultuous time in the life of our nation.

When I read this, I know what I think he is saying. What do you think?

This Just In!

Last night, I was flying through the channels and I noticed that the "Big Three" news channels, Fox, CNN, and MSNBC all had at the bottom of the screen a tab that said "BREAKING NEWS." Then on each network, the crawl under the tab had a different story. Can they all be breaking news?

I wonder if America hasn't become a nation of "urgency junkies." Everything has to be a disaster to get our attention. As for me, the opposite is now true. So much stuff on the news is "breaking" that now, I just gloss right over it.

And often when I do pay attention, I find that what is urgent is just an ad for what will be on the news magazine show later. It's not news, it's a teaser to get me to keep watching.

So what stories were they trumpettng last night? I have no idea. I watched "Dodgeball" on FX. Give me a funny movie over a shill any day.

Insights on Matthew 25:31-46

I have had a tough time this week trying to make heads or tails of this passage. Honestly, the reason why is that it is filled with rich images. The problem I had was finding the central one. That's when I lit upon the image-I was going off on tangents. Interesting ones, but insignificant ones all the same.

Here's the rest of what I found:

1. It looks like a parable, but it's not. It's an apocolyptic image tht puts the capstone on the previous six parables
2. It's not about saving our own souls, not about "becoming a sheep." It's about doing justice and bringing peace because that's where God is.
3. It's not about separating the sheep from the goats. That's not our job, it's God's. Any judgement we make is provisional.

In the liturgical calendar we celebrate Christ the King Sunday this weekend. This passage is about Christ's reign where we are the humble subjects. We best serve when we serve where Christ is, in the lives of the poor, neglected, and down-trodden. As people, we will behave like both sheep and goats, that's the nature of sin. But the judge of which we are is the Lord, not us.

Don't celebrate being a sheep, that's not what the sheep do.

Kissing Your Sister

Last weekend, the Philadelphia Eagles game ended in a tie. In the NFL, if after regulation time, the game ends in a tie, then there is one fifteen minute overtime period. If the score is still tied, then the game goes down in the books as a tie.

Unfortunately, the Philadelphia Eagles Quarterback didn't know this. He allowed time to expire without his kicker getting on the field to try a field goal.

In sports, they say a tie is like "kissing your sister." In this case, it reminds me more of the story of Jacob from the Old Testament who marries the wrong sister after his Father-in-Law tricks him and he doesn't realize it until he lifts the veil in the wedding chamber (Genesis 29:15-30).

Whoops, in that case, it's not kissing your sister, but kissing the wrong sister.

Nostalgia, or Something Very Frightening

I found this little gem from the Vermont Country Store Christmas Catalog...

Silvery Tinsel Tree for Those Dreaming of a Very '60s Christmas.

Remember the silvery tinsel trees from the '50s and '60s, so shiny, so wonderfully unnatural, so full of sparkle and light? So many of our customers wanted to re-create that magical look that we found them, complete with bursts of feathery soft, silver plastic needles. Both the 4' and the 6' trees sit in a sturdy metal base and comes apart for easy storage.

• 6' floor (#43196) or 4' tabletop (#44378) tree
• Shiny silver plastic needles
• Year after year of decorative fun
• Use with color wheel (#37064) for an explosion of color

Add glamour and fun to holiday decorating with sparkly, magical tinsel trees.

I tried to post a pic, but I can still put up the link!

Sing along! Have yourself a very cool Christmas...now.......

Cover Songs...or The Same Thing Only Different

Cover songs, or "remakes" if you will have a place in the pantheon of music--only if they are able to reimagine the song. I have told you of my love for Dishwalla's version of The Carpenters "It's Going to Take Some Time This Time."


Now I share another special cover. This song, "Mad World" was originally recorded by the 80's band Tears for Fears, a part of the 1980's New Wave British Invasion. Here is their original version:



Good song, odd video, strange dancing. These elements were the hallmarks of the "TFF" video of the 80's.

It was covered by Gary Jules for the movie "Donnie Darko." Here is that version:



This is what I mean by a good cover. Jules' version is quite different from the original. He is not just singing the song, he is reinterpretting it for a new audience. It is making it new again that makes it timely. That's the difference between "making music" and "making records."

It always makes me want to slap Michael Bolton every time I hear his version of "When a Man Loves a Woman." If you aren't going to change a note, what's the point? (Millions of dollars, yeah, yeah.)

Get the Percy Sledge and compare for yourself!

Answer to the Puzzle!

The direction you turn is........ uphill. (For everyone who is groaning out there, no where in my last post were the words "left" or "right." )

This was my epiphany, with no other clue of which way to turn, it finally dawned on me that it was logical that the ski lodge would be located uphill; and I was correct.

To come to this conclusion, I had to break out of my normal way of looking at things. I had to get rid of my old thoughts about street directions and think about where I would put a ski lodge. I had to break out of my usual way of thinking and consider a new logic that fit the paradigm of where I was better than the paradigm of what I was familiar with.

Scripture teaches us that this is not our world. We need to live like that, and make our turns accordingly.

Oh, visit Snow King Resort online at http://www.snowking.com.

A Puzzle

True Story--In my prior life, I worked in Higher Education. Before coming to the University of Arkansas I worked over eight years in rural southeast Coloradl. I was on my way with two co-workers to conference at the Snow King Resort in Jackson Hole (gutter work, I know). The address of the lodge is 400 East Snow King Avenue.

Coming into town, I found Snow King Avenue ahead of me at a "T" intersection. I'm in the long part of the "T" and Snow King is the crossbar. Ahead of me is a field so there are no addresses to see to tell me which way to turn. The lodge was far enough away so that I could not see lights in either direction so that's no help. The sun is down, so that doesn't help tell me which way to turn. After a moment I had an epiphany, turned, and got directly to the lodge.

The puzzle--which direction do you turn? The answer Sunday evening!

Are People Really So Different?

All right, so I'm watching "Deal or No Deal" while the laundry finishes up in the dryer (oh, all right, while Marie finishes up the laundry) and the guy on stage is pacing back and forth while Howie tells him his options ad nausium. What's so different between this and every other episode of "Deal or No Deal?" The guy was in a wheelchair.

I don't know his story, all I know is that the $1,000,000 case is still on the board and he's pacing. How does a parylized man pace? Back and forth, like everyone else paces. It was a thought that had never ever crossed my mind, but here it is. La voila!

A couple of years ago, a member of the chruch told me "Louie (not his real name) says I go to church enough for both of us." What pastor hasn't heard a church lady deliver that line? Me, I heard it from another man. I heard it from his partner.

I ask you whether we pace or love, are people really so different?

It took Sting to remind us "the Russians love their children, too."

More Music!

Imagine if you will...a Beatles song with Todd Rundgren on rhythm , Joe Jackson on Piano, and playing lead a string quartet that goes by the name Ethel. Enjoy!

Todd Rundgren, Joe Jackson, and Ethel on Late Night with Conan O'Brien


Joe Jackson is frankly one of my all time favorite performers. He started doing New Wave/Punk in the late 1970's and has evolved through big band, pop, jive, Latin, neo-classical...and a piece on the Seven Deadly Sins.

On his 1988 Double Live Album/CD Set there is a picture of an audience he took from the stage in Toronto while openning for The Who. You gotta love a guy with the nerve to put a picture of 80,000 people flipping you off on your own live album.

You gotta love Joe!

WWJD?

No, not "What would Jesus do?" I ask, "What would Jesus drive?" This is an old question, but with last summer's surge in gas prices, it takes on new urgency.

My answer: A pick-up, probably a 1500/150 with stock stereo, an extended cab, toolbox, towing package and bed liner.

Jesus was a carpenter. There are those in the "historical Jesus" camp that say he was more of a "contractor" than a "laborer". Regardless, he would need a place for his tools, his supplies, and his crew. The bed liner helps prevent damage and rust. He wouldn't upgrade to the Bose sound system or get the King Ranch package. If the AC went out, I don't think Jesus would bother getting it fixed.

As for the towing package, you never know when you need to bring extra material to the job site. Remember too, his buddies fished, the tow package is definitely a necessity.

Yes, a hybrid if available and powerful enough, either way Jesus would need substance over style.

Review of "The Shack"

I have just (I mean about two hours ago) finished reading "The Shack" by William Young. To answer the question "Did I like it?" will betray one of the concepts of the book. The book tells the reader that people make things far more complicated than God intended, and I agree. But there are several elements I want to review so I will make it complicated. With that, let's go--

As a theologian, I actually liked what the book accomplished as a theology primer. If you have read any other review, you will know that there is a thread of trinitarian theology throughout it. As I was reading it I was thinking to myself, "ooh, there's a great example of perichorisis," and "now that's a cool way to look at the economic trinity," and "there's the great look at the immanence/transcendence of God." In that regard, it is a very interesting and evocative view of trinitarian theology. It's not complete, and I wouldn't recommend citing it while writing ordination exams, but as a place to start, I liked it.

I also give Young credit for tackling some very difficult concepts of physical representation of the Trinity and modalism. This could not have been easy, and so cudos for even trying. I believe he succeeded in this as well as anybody can given the milieu of the novel and limits of language.

But being a jaded man, as literature, I think the novel was simply average. There was a tone of emotional manipulation that left me uncomfortable throughout my reading. The front cover of my trade paperback version tells me "The Shack" is our generation's "Pilgrim's Progress." The back cover tells me that the author "suffered a great loss as a child and young adult" without telling the reader the nature of the "loss." The novel itself is anchored by A Great Sadness with those words in italics throughout the text.

By the time I got to the 4th chapter, titled A Great Sadness, I felt as if I was being dragged through an emotional muck, much of which was supported not by the text of the novel. The most grieveous example being the author's use of literary devices including a "Foreword" and "After Words" which were not the notes of the author but of the narrator. As a writer friend of mine once wrote, this is the difference between the "author" and the "authorial I." My friend recognizes and revels in the device, blowing out the fourth wall (itself a device). Young seems to use it to manipulate the reader.

Further, the package itself invites the reader to get more copies for friends and book groups and tells of the windblown Media Group's difficulty in finding a publisher and their subsequent efforts to get "The Shack" made into a movie. I don't think Bunyon had to resort to that in the first printing of "Pilgrim's Progress." Add to that info about the book's tangent projects found on the fiinal leaves and I wonder if the popularity of this novel is the phenomenon the publisher will have you believe or if this is the best marketed Christian book of the past ten years.

All in all, it is a page turner, it is entertaining, and it is very moving. I laughed, I cried, yet I felt manipulated by the author more than moved by the characters. There is a theological value to the work which makes this a great youth study, women's group book, or even a supplemental text for a high school theology class. It is a good place to start, but it should by no means be the end all of theological instruction or relationship development.

cover photo taken from amazon.com

One more note, as I say I am jaded, this is more to my woe than an insult toward people who really like the book. Still, it is my bias, my jading and my blog.

Now That's Talent!

This week's sermon, is based on "The Parable of the Talents." According to their ability, the Master gives his slaves one, two or five talents. One of the things I did in preparation is determine the value of a talent in American Dollars. And the grand total (as of the November 12, 2008 spot silver open) is...

US$6,519.45

That would mean that the $700 Billion Credit Bail-Out comes to...

107,371,020.56 Talents

So our government is giving away over 107 million talents of silver to people who couldn't manage it in the first place, and I'm preaching a stewardship sermon. Well played!

Many say that this is not a bail out of big banks, it is a bail out for the American economy. I say we'll see when we see who gets the money. Will it be big banks with bad paper or will it be poor people about to lose their homes?

As Seen on the Ellen Degeneres Show!

The Ellen show last week featured a consumer reporter with "cheap fixes." One of them was a spray bottle filled with vodka to kill mildew. It is very useful to help freshen up clothes that have been in storage all summer waiting for the first chill of autumn.

So today, I went to one of my two local liquor stores and purchased a bottle of cheap, cheap cheap vodka, distilled with pride in the Russian province of Kentucky.

As I went to pay the $1.90 for 200ml of Aristocrat Royal Vodka I told the woman ringing me up about Ellen's money saving mildew killer.

Why do we do that? Why do we explain purchases to the people ringing them up? You know the biggest lie told in the mini-mart is "I buy it for the articles." (Hey, I imagine that's just as true for National Geographic as it is for the SI Swimsuit issue!)

Well, I answered that question for her and myself saying, "I don't know why I told you this...maybe it's just because if I was going to get a tiny bottle of vodka...I'd pick something a little less rotgut."

Yeah, that's right, take pride in your work!

Some Thoughts on the Parable of the Talents

I once promised some musings on the sermon before it is written...so here's something on the Parable of the Talents, Matthew 25:14-30.

1. Each of the three servants received according to their ability...there is meritocracy in this statement that can't be denied,
2. While 1 is true, the one who received least received an extravagant amount,
3. While 2 is true, to the Master these are just a few things...with many more things in the offing,
4. Those who made gains with the Master's assets were invited to enter into the joy of their Master, and
5. The servant's reaction to the Master anticipated the Master's reactions to the servants.

As far as stewardship goes, I think this means that we receive much from the master and we need to use those assets well. On top of that, it also means that "our" assets, "our" gifts, "our" stuff isn't "ours" at all.

A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words

Dan Krotz from Sow's Ear Antiques in Berryville sent me these images yesterday (click the thumbnail for the larger image):


As the old song goes, let there be peace on earth and let it begin with me.

A Dangerous Host

The October 7 issue of "Christian Century" has an article about ministers who celebrate the Lord's Supper at Friendship Park, a border area south of San Diego. The atricle says for generations, people have come to this place to visit family and friends on the other side of the border. Because of the war on terror, this place is changing.

On June 1st of this year, in a protest to the government policies, restrictions on the park and even its planned demolition, several area ministers have begun celebrating "a love feast" in the park, passing the elements through the fence. (A love feast was celebrated instead of the Lord's Supper so that the liturgical issues of different denominational interpretations of the meal could be set aside.)

Before this service, the Border Patrol told the people not to pass the elements through the fence. Doing so would be considered a customs violation.

It's about time we figured out how dangerous the Lord's Supper is. (No,my tongue is not in my cheek.) Regardless of how you believe the elements consecrate, we all believe that Christ said "this is my body and this is my blood," and we take and eat this feast until he comes again.

We believe Christ gave this meal to his disciples and to the world to fortify and build the Body of Christ, the Church Universal, to continue the work of God in the world. Our boundries are not His boundries. Jesus demands we reach across to all barriers, physical and otherwise, to do what he did, what he saw the Father doing.

This is dangerous stuff and the government says so. I say it is dangerous too, but not for the same reason. The eucharist builds the Body of Christ to transcend politics and religion--to make the world and the heart a holy place.

When Accountants Practice Medicine

Today, Marie had an appointment at the Neurologist's in Fayetteville. She sees him for migraines. During the visit, we had to talk about getting a "letter of medical necessity" for one of her drugs so it would be covered by the insurance.

We spent more time talking about insurance than we did about Marie's medical condition. This wasn't because he neglected her, it was because the insurance took more time.

I know that these procedures were put in place because some doc's abused the system. But now the system abuses the doc's and the patients. If it were not profitable it would not be so. But where ever there are people there will be abuse, we call it sin (go ahead, google it, I'll wait).

Any posting where "business" and "health" are both appropriate tags is a pox on all of our houses.

The Most Amazing Thing about the American Political System

I wish I could remember where I first read this: "The most amazing thing about the American Political system is that the government changed hands and the tanks did not roll in the streets." This was written about Watergate over 30 years ago and it still rings true today.

Congrats to President-Elect Obama. Congrats to Senator McCain. I just heard McCain's concession speech and it was a celebration of the joy of being able to run for the presidency with the continuing joy of being able to serve this nation.

Let us pray for both men, their families, and our nation.

Cartoon by Kurt Snibbe, ESPN.com.

Election Day

Election Day is finally here...get out and vote. If you all ready have voted, good for you!

So if you will allow me one more foray into classic rock, this song sort of reminds me of the last two presidential elections. Be with God Warren!

Pollitics for Dummies!

Earlier today, I got a phone call from United States Senator John Cornyn asking for my support. He wants me to come to the polls on Tuesday and vote. This might be the thing to do if not for two things:

1. I voted today, and
2. I haven't lived in TEXAS in almost four years.

One word, and this applies to any represenative of any American Political party that calls former residents who now live out of state: Dummy!

Keep in mind the computer that called my phone could have easily been programmed not to dial out of state numbers. I stayed on the whole minute just to cost the campaign the whole dime.

Now, how about that possible voter fraud thing?

How to Spend a $700 Billion Bail-Out

Here it is, "Spend It on Love" by The Rainmakers.

The Rainmakers

My taste in music has been called suspect. Well, I can't disagree so I will wear it as a badge of honor. One of my favorite bands is a Kansas City band called "The Rainmakers." They released three albums (yes, albums) on Polygram along with a couple more on Polygram's subsidiary in Norway.

This song comes from a self-produced and self released disc called "Skin" in 1997. Not the best video in the world, but listen the music and the lyrics...this is one haunting CD. Check out their website or YouTube for more of their stuff.

Fall Back Tonight

My favorite "Day Light Savings Time" story is, as it often is, a story of misspent youth.

My high school drama department did three shows a year. A play in the fall, another in the spring, and the big winter musical. When I was a senior, the last night of the fall play was the same night Day Light Savings Time ended. Of course there was a cast party which lasted long into the night.

The next morning when I woke, I went to the kitchen and said "hi" to my mom. She then asked me, "What time did you get home last night?" Without hesitation I told her, "3 AM." But she wasn't done with me.

"Honey," she asks again, "which 3 AM?" Again, I told her without hesitation, "The second time."

She then says, "That's right."

Either I was thinking or I was thinking out loud: "So why did you ask?" Either way, I don't remember an answer, but I do remember a sly smile on her face.

Love you Mom.

Be sure to set your clocks back one hour before going to bed tonight.