Who doesn't love a good conspiracy theory? I know I do. Convulusion with paranoia and a touch of Rube Goldberg always make the best ones, and there are two out there catching my attention right now.
Into politics? This one is becoming a golden oldie or an instant classic--the Obama isn't a citizen so how can he be President theory.
Into sports? This is a new one--Coach Belichick of New England and GM Scott Pioli of KC are hooking up a deal to get KC talent and dump salary off of the New England roster to the benefit of both.
The best thing about a conspiracy theory is that if nothing comes true, that can always be blamed on the conspiracy! Failure or pulling the plug is a function of conspiracy! "Oh, they had to stop what they were doing because they were afraid we were on their trail." Please.
My favorite from the 1984 Presidential election was that Clinton was looking at Colorado Governor Roy Roemer as a running mate to shore up Western support. Roemer denied it. "Bingo, why would he deny it unless he were considering it?" asks the conspiracy buff.
The answer that it might be the truth never crosses our the mind of the theorist.
Senator Al Gore is gets the nomination instead of Roemer, "Ah!" goes the conspiracy king, "Speculation was too hot so he had to duck out."
This is why I love conspiracy theories, they can eventually swallow themselves by their own circular logic. Not to say I haven't speculated once or twice...
I'm still trying to get my head around "KC talent."
ReplyDeleteI did hear, however, that a scheme is underfoot to teach Razorback players how to read. They may bring in Sister Mary Margaret Sneiderhosenoffenbach--from Seton Hall--to manage the tutorial program. No dount, she will slip in a whole bunch of five and six letter words. Ultimately, we can depend on the Hogs becoming pipe smokin' fops who are so busy studying Dante and Edna St. Vincent Millay that they won't give a darn about a goal line defense. I hope the Razorback "foundation" gets wind of this dasterdly plot and nips it int he bud!