Pastor Paul's September 13 Newsletter Article

Here's my article for the Federated Flash, the newsletter of The Federated Church in Weatherford, Oklahoma!

Paul’s Letter to the Church at Weatherford

Reading the announcements in last Sunday’s bulletin, you saw this…

Monday, September 19
6:00 pm Preliminary Budget Meeting—If you have anything for the 2017 Budget, please get it to Pastor Paul, Bruce Magill, or Suzy Maness by Sunday September 18.

First off, don’t let the image put you off, it’s true, budget work is God’s work, Christ’s work, the work of the church. I would tell people I loved statistics because it took numbers and translated them into English. “Yes, based on all of this gobbled-gook there is a 20% chance of rain.” That’s just statistics and weather and the percent chance your picnic will be rained out. (We’ll leave the statistics on how trustworthy the meteorologist is for another day.)

Budgets are just how we translate how we do the work of the church into dollars and cents. How much did it cost to heat and cool the church building and parsonage last year and how much do we estimate it will cost this year? How much do we send to the three denominations so they can do their work? How much money do we send to missions? Do we tithe? How much does it actually cost to have a pastor? Is there more than salary? What does it cost to run Positive Pathways? How much does Ronda make? Do we even pay Ronda? (The answer to that one is “not this year,” she volunteers and puts money into the program.) What do we get from… well, what do we get?

These are all good questions, and deserve good answers, so here’s the Board’s tentative time frame:

Monday, September 19—Pastor Paul, Treasurer Bruce Magill, and Board Chair Suzy Maness will review the budget from 2016 with an eye to 2017. If you have any suggestions of things you want to do in 2017, let’s say a yoga class in the Fellowship Hall, a Music Program in the Sanctuary, or a Bible Study, put something in writing and share it with one or all of us! This is a closed meeting, we’re going over numbers and not making any hard decisions.

Monday, October 3—Board Meeting This is the meeting where the Board will review the budget. All Committee Chairs are board members so they have voice and vote. Make sure your suggestions are in so considerations can be made! If you have a suggestion that falls outside of the normal structure, find an advocate on the board, it’s the best way!

Sunday in late October or early November to be decided: The board has not decided on what day the budget will be presented.  

Sunday November 20—Consecration Sunday That’s the day we put ourselves in the offering. That’s the day we pledge to offer what we have of our time, talent, and treasure to make this ministry plan happen. Because the budget is a ministry plan the way an accountant sees it.

So like the statue says, Church budgets are Christ’s work too. We must treat them like they are the work of God to do the work of the Church to spread the Good News of Jesus Christ, because if it’s not, we’re just a Sunday Social Club and there are better ways to spend a Sunday morning if that’s all we are. But I say we’re more than a social club, we’re the Body of Christ, so…

See you in Church, Paul

I Do Not Think That Means What They Think That Means...

I know that Egg Whites are a healthy alternative. McDonalds has an egg white option and so does Subway. But you know...

I just don't think this is what they meant when they were talking about egg whites being a healthy alternative. Just sayin'...

The Vanilla Accent

A long time ago I heard that telemarketers often headquartered in Omaha because compared to the rest of America people in Omaha had a vanilla accent, or rather a plain speaking voice, no accent at all. Forgive me for saying after trying to get my AT&T DSL hooked up with Reggie in Bangalore three years ago that I wished companies stayed with vanilla.

The New York Times Opinion Page published an interactive quiz called "How Y’all, Youse and You Guys Talk. What does the way you speak say about where you’re from?" This is the link to my accent map. It shows my accent is most like Omaha, Lincoln, and Des Moines. My accent is least like New York City, which ironically is where my father was born and raised. If you have 10 minutes it's good fun.

Racial Equality, the Fight Continues in Even the Smallest Corners

If you are a regular follower of my blogs you know that I live in Marshall, Texas. The civil rights history of Marshall is long and storied. It is said the sit-in was invented here. 

At the Paramount Theater, if you were black during the eras before the 1960s, you walked past the front theater door where whites entered and rounded the corner to buy your ticket. You walked a steep flight of steps to enter and sat in the "Buzzard's Roost." Blacks weren't allowed to sit with whites, obvious in Jim Crow Marshall, but blacks weren't even allowed to enter with whites. CORE founder James L. Farmer Jr. who grew up in Marshall was so incensed that he went to Washington in 1941 to fight for civil rights.

The 1949 film "Pinky" became the subject of a tremendous battle when the city fathers decided it could not be shown in Marshall because the picture depicts "(1) a white man retaining his love for a woman after learning that she is a Negro, (2) a white man kissing and embracing a Negro woman, (3) two white ruffians assaulting Pinky after she has told them she is colored."The cinema owner was convicted of violating the ruling and was fined $200. He appealed the conviction all the way to the U.S. Supreme Court where he eventually won his appeal.

I mention this because Marshall Cinema is showing "White House Down" this week. It's the story of Channing Tatum saving the President of the United States played by Jamie Foxx from home grown terrorists. To the right you will see how it's posted on the Marshall Cinema website (as of July 6, 2013 at 10:30 am).

As you can see, this movie evidently doesn't star Jamie Foxx. It stars Maggie Gyllenhaal. Really? Yes, she's in the movie and she's important to the action but she isn't the star of the show. It's Tatum and Foxx, and for one reason or another Jamie Foxx isn't on the bill. 

Even in the smallest corners of our nation and our cybernation, discrimination exists. There is no other reason I can imagine leaving Jamie Foxx off of their web page. Do people not know? Are people so afraid of Jamie Foxx that even though his picture is on the page his name dare not be listed? Is Maggie Gyllenhaal a bigger draw? 

I find it hard to consider, but not so hard to believe, that even in the quietest moments, in the smallest corners of the internet, this fight has to continue.

Thanks to the Shreveport Times, http://www.shreveporttimes.com/article/20080217/LIVING/802160309/On-trail-history-Marshal-Texas-offers-black-heritage-tour

and Wikipedia, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pinky_(film)

The Sublime Art of Being Offensive

Recently I was told that a post I put on Facebook was offensive. Let's be honest, it was adolescent. I was asked by someone I respect to delete it so I did. No problem, no offense taken at the suggestion. I won't even post it here to show just how offensive it was. Don't bother trying to judge for yourself, just know it was in poor taste. I admit it, I have bad taste sometimes, especially when others make it possible for me to exercise my bad taste.

Of course, that's why my Facebook privacy settings are "friends only." For what that's worth in the land of internet privacy, but that's for another day. There was nothing sublime about how offensive my comment was. But I do like to look for the sublime of what's offensive.

By the way, what my post was a comment on the poor quality of mass advertising of church/worship in America. The picture associated with my caption was a part of a vast marketing (church marketing ~~SHUDDER~~) campaign and it was ripe for lampooning.

I believe the most sublime of offenses is found in our health care system. Recently, someone from the Board of Pensions, the PC(USA) insurance and pension group, came to Grace Presbytery to get the grassroots response from plan participants about their multiple plans to make Presbyterian insurance more financially solvent.

Before I had my say, I told the representative that I respect what he was doing trying to fix our little corner of a system that's broken. I dare say that the PC(USA) part of the system is less broken than our society as a whole, but there are some big problems.

The one he spoke about was financing. He noted that with increased expenses there a bulge in the pipeline and when it comes to a weak spot there would be trouble. He noted that two things needed to happen. There would have to be more revenue and less expenses.

He said that not everybody can have the "new" drug that was advertised on the television when the old drugs would work. He said that not everybody needed the state of the art orthopedic device when others would work. That's fine with me, but for one major problem.

The Board currently employs two different management companies to operate the plan. They employ one to handle medicines and another to handle doctors and hospitals. This is actually a problem for the consumer. Each company has incentives to reduce what they pay out. This is the best possible system to care for the bottom line of these company and the Board working to pay no claims at all.

In my family, my wife is on an expensive medicine for migraines which the medicine component of our insurance will not pick up unless she uses others first. Problem one: She has used those other medicines, but they were provided by doctor samples so the insurance company does not have a record. No prescription  no copay, it doesn't really exist so they don't want to help with the one that does work. Problem two: If she doesn't take it she ends up in the Emergency Room with a headache that registers 10 on a scale of 10. They take care of her, but at a cost.

Do you see the issue? The medicine company doesn't care if she uses the ER because it's not on their bottom line. When she uses the med, the medical service folks are glad they aren't paying for ER treatment  Our system has effectively pitted one component of itself against the other. Our insurance is literally at war with itself to get the other guy to pay.

So how do we save money, by refusing any and all claims. We save money by increasing pain because we can't get meds that do work. Tests that can find damage can be deferred because others weren't taken first, who cares if that deferred test can save a life. Oh, and yes, this happened to us to when my wife's surgeon actually watched her bowel perforate during a test.

Good times.

So if this is how they reduce expenses, how do they plan to increase income? I'm glad you asked.

One way, probably the most painful and equitable is to raise everyone's relative expense from 21% to 23%. Not cheap is it.

Another way is just to cover the pastor and nobody else in the family. They have two different options under this provision, but they have the similarity that the Pastor getting coverage alone is where they start. Don't get me wrong, I love Jesus, but I suspect Jesus wants me to take care of my family. So if we went this way, the extra would come out of the pastor's, our of my pocket directly.

This is where the board has lost track of something fundamental. The source of my salary and the source of the money to pay the Board comes out of the same pockets, or more accurately, the same plate. It is the congregation that sends money to the Board and pays my salary. It's all one source!

Hooray to the families where there is more than one breadwinner. They can afford it, or they can finagle another way of getting health insurance between the two employers. That isn't so in my family. Disease has made it impossible for my wife to work. So the Board has given me two choices, find a better paying call or get another job.

Leave the small church that can't really afford all the bells and whistles of the plan on its own or find a job in that same small town... probably a town that is still recovering from the Great Recession and isn't firmly on its feet yet. If these are our choices then that is the church of the future. Singles who can be covered alone, the independently wealthy, dual career folks who can both find work, and tent-makers.

I'll say it again, it's the whole American health care system that's broken. The Board's plan has its merits and I thank God everyday I have insurance, and since I'm at the pharmacy almost everyday I'm not exaggerating. Complaining that the Board isn't doing enough is like saying the little Dutch boy isn't doing enough during a tsunami. But that's the problem-Our health care system isn't facing a bulge in the pipeline, it's a tsunami and all we have are Dutch boys. That's offensive.

My picture and caption, sure it was offensive. The kind of offensive that gets deleted. Life and death, sickness and health, what we're doing with that is a whole new kind of offensive. Deleting life is offensive too.

Telemarketing and DirecTV

As many of you know, the church that I was serving chose to close. This was traumatic for everyone involved. As for me, there have been many changes. One of them has been moving from our home of two-and-a-half years. We are now renting a room from a friend. Thank God for good friends who are willing to lift a helping hand! As a part of moving, I had to shut off the utilities. Obvious, eh?

Telemarketing has become an art unto itself. Each time I called to cut off a service the person at the call center would ask why. I would tell them that I was moving because I had lost my job. Most were sympathetic, some just went on with the day. Not DirecTV.

When I called them they asked why and I told the why. So the call center attendant asked if the place where I was moving had DirecTV. Really? I lost my job, found a room, and you want to know if the woman who owns the house where I will live has or wants DirecTV? I was in shock, but I just said she was happy with her service.

Then a couple of days later I got the follow up call asking why I was dropping the DirecTV. I decided to be a little more direct. I said "I lost my job. I am unemployed. By the grace of God we found a room to rent but that meant I had to end my DirecTV service." Not to be deterred, she asked if our new landlord was interested in DirecTV. Really? Really again? I couldn't believe it, but I was polite again and said no.

I was sure I had to share this with you my blogging audience but hadn't gotten around to it... until I checked my email this evening and found this...

This is just a part of the image, but you get the point, I am still getting begging from DirecTV.

So, here's the deal, we liked DirecTV. We liked it very much. But when the time comes again, I will remember this experience, and when I was unemployed they still wanted to sell me what I could not use.

Another Bar Story-This One of Mystery and Intrigue

One day while doing my managerial duty stuff, I answered the phone. So far so good, right. On the other end of the line was a prosecutor from Greene County, Missouri, the Springfield area. He told me that he was investigating a fraud. He had a woman named Jane Poe (not her real name and that's not all) who was seeking WIC and other benefits for her newborn child. The problem is that according to the Social Security Administration I had a woman by the same name working for me in Kansas City. And yes, I had a Jane Poe working for me.

He told me that he suspected his Jane Poe was using my Jane Poe's information to get illegal benefits.

So I went on the hound dog trail and after a couple of days discovered the truth: there was a fraud being perpetrated, not against him but against me. You see, he had the real Jane Poe in Springfield. I had Jane's sister Lynne. You see Jane was over the age of 21 and could tend bar, Lynne wasn't 21 and it was illegal for her to tend bar. Lynne took Jane's ID and got herself a job at my bar.

When I was sure of my information I called the man in Greene County back. He told me "Wait, I'm investigating a fraud here!" I told him "Yes you are, it's just not the fraud you thought it was." He was finally convinced he had the real Jane and I had the real Lynne. Jane got her benefits and Lynne got fired.

See, not all bar stories are beer and blood. There's some real Micky Spillane some days.

A Gift Buyer's Guide to Mother's Day?

Mother's Day is a little less than two weeks away, so two local merchants here in Marshall, Texas are here to remind you it's not too soon to shop for that perfect gift.

On the way to work a Home Health Care Supply store has this sign--

Lift Chairs

for

Mother's Day

I guess that's because nothing says love like "Ma, you're so fat..." or "Ma, your knees are so badly shot that I got you a lift chair! Happy Mother's Day!"

I felt that way until today when I went to the pharmacy where the bags were stamped

Happy

Mother's

Day

I guess that's because nothing says love like, "Here ya go Ma, stay on your meds!"

Please, do better than that for your Mother this Mother's Day... unless she asks for a lift chair or meds. Then it's up to you!

Ozzie and Miami

When he was manager of the Chicago White Sox, Ozzie Guillen was known for putting his foot in his mouth. He would say the most absurd things! This was a part of the reason the Miami Marlins were so happy to land him, and why it was so easy for the Sox to let him go.

The Miami Marlins, formerly the Florida Marlins, have two World Series Championships and no fan base. It's almost impossible to get a house for a game in Miami! Between the weather (rain at 5PM anybody?) and, well, it's Miami people, the Marlins never drew much of a crowd.

This year was the first big step in changing that. There's a new baseball stadium on the site of the old Orange Bowl. There's a retractable roof so there's no more problems with the rain. There's a change from a generic "Florida" name to a new "Miami" vibe. The last piece of the puzzle was Ozzie. Venezuelan by birth, it was hoped Ozzie could speak to the Latin population of the city in ways others could not.

Whoops.

ESPN reports Guillen told Time magazine for an article published last week that he loves Castro and respects him for staying in power for so long. If you want to alienate Miami's Cuban population, with a stadium in the heart of Little Havana, that's the best way to do it.

I think this analysis says more about what Ozzie meant to say than the quotes. Ozzie has always seen himself as a rebel. He's willing to do or say what ever it takes to win games and championships, his way of staying in power. He said he deplores Castro's politics, but loves his chutzpah. He loves the fact that a man so despised by the world can be a "success." He is still President-for-Life after all. Maybe that's the title Ozzie wants, President-for-Life. Forget these silly front office people. Forget the press. Forget the crowds. All that matters is the number of wins. Fidel is a winner and Ozzie backs the winner... even though he hates his politics.

I know little of Florida or Miami politics, but this much I have learned: There is no way of extolling love for Castro in South Florida that even comes close to being appropriate. Ozzie committed the first sin of trying to get Miami's Latin and specifically Cuban population to follow. That's all.

Ozzie has apologized. Whether it's because he "betrayed his Latin community" or for causing such a storm that he might lose his job we'll see. In my opinion he'd be a fool not to be sorry for both of these things. In both of these things he seems sincere.

In the meantime, he begins a five game suspension. Will he be fired? I suspect it depends on whether or not the storm subsides and people go to the stadium or not. We'll see next week.

Another Bar Story, This One with Extra Grace!

One of the truest reasons men work in bars is to meet women. That may seem shallow and it may seem short-sighted, but that's what makes it true!

One night when I was managing Buzzard Beach in Westport, Kansas City, Missouri, USA, one of my doormen came up to me after the bar closed. I was sitting on the back bar with my legs crossed much like a modern day Buddha. He started to apologize. He was sincere but he was also waiting judgement so he might have been a little on edge.

You see, he had begun seeing a waitress from a bar and restaurant across the street so after her shift ended, she would come over and see Scott. She was a cutie too, curly blonde hair, great legs and a so-on that was before its time.

Something you probably don't know but need to for this story is that Buzzard Beach was a saloon, a tavern-we had beer, cocktails, and popcorn. To work in a tavern you had to be 21. Well, she worked in a restaurant that served drinks. You only had to be 18 to work there. Thus my doorman's dilemma, he met her at our bar, but it wasn't until after a couple of weeks that he discovers she isn't 21.

Let me add that minors in a tavern could get you closed and the person who serves a minor could loose their liquor card-a license that allows a bartender to dispense. So you see, as Ricky Ricardo would say, he "had some 'splaining to do."

He walked up and said, "I'm sorry. I didn't know she wasn't 21. As soon as I found out I took care of it. She won't be back until she is 21. This won't happen again."

Well, let's just say that I took the high road on this one. I said, "First, I accept your apology. Second, you did find out she wasn't 21, and that's big. Third, as soon as you did find out you fixed it. Fourth, I believe you, this won't happen again. Fifth" and at this point I addressed the assembled staff; the three bartenders, three doormen, and bar back who were also working and asked, "fifth, guys, how many of us met a girl here at the Buzzard and didn't discover until later that she wasn't 21?" Everyone of us raised his hand. The guys who had been there ten years, the owner's brother, and even me, everyone of us raised our hands.

I ended my lesson for the day saying, "Finally, you're in good company." Grace over hypocrisy is a winner every time, and we always carded his paramours in the future.

Hank Jr. and High School Civics

Hank Williams, Jr. recently told Fox News that for his political money, President Obama is as big an enemy to his way of life as Hitler was an enemy to the Jews. Because of this comment, ESPN did not play the intro Hank recorded for Monday Night Football. This was the first time in over 20 years that some rendition of "all my rowdy friends..." didn't precede MNF. Hank apologized, but that doesn't mean all is done.

This morning ESPN reported that they have parted ways with Hank, Jr., though Hank says he didn't get fired, he quit them. He quit them because: "By pulling my opening Oct 3rd, You (ESPN) stepped on the Toes of The First Amendment Freedom of Speech, so therefore Me, My Song, and All My Rowdy Friends are OUT OF HERE. It's been a great run."

I'm not here to debate the politics. Let me simply say Hank and I will never be seen at the same political fundraiser and that should just about do it. But for my point...

Hank Jr. says ESPN, a private company owned by the Disney Corporation infringed on his first amendment right to free speech. Hank, the first amendment says:

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances. (emphasis added)

Hank has just said that the Disney Corporation is Congress. Only Congress can infringe on that right, so Disney must be Congress, right? Wrong, of course. Disney isn't Congress, no matter how powerful Disney is, it still isn't Congress.

So no Hank, ESPN, Disney and everyone else did not infringe on your first amendment rights. In fact, you exercised your rights to say what you wanted to say. And ESPN and Disney exercised their rights to say we don't want to be affiliated with you anymore.

My dad used to have a word for this, consequences. Sure, go ahead and say and do whatever you want, but don't cry about it when you face the music... and in this case, the music isn't yours anymore. Sorry you've lost the only exposure you've gotten in years, but don't cross the water if you can't swim the tide. Your high school civics teacher wants you back for a refresher.

Now for the next question...Will ESPN find a half-way decent replacement to "All My Rowdy Friends" or have they cut off their nose to spite their face? Sure, they exercised their rights, and may have taken some sort of high road (or did Hank when he "apologized then quit"), but what comes next? That may be better than watching the Chiefs on MNF in a few weeks.

Congratulations to our National Leaders, You've Really Done It Now

I know that I should refrain from language that is not so nice, but sometimes there are few phrases that express meaning more clearly than a colorful one. Congratulations to the President and Congress, you've really screwed the pooch this time.

Standard & Poor's is the most often cited ratings agency for bonds and other sorts of debt. In short, the better your rating, the cheaper it is to get financing. It' s kind of like a credit score for people who finance big debt. This is what they had to say about the "quality" of US Debt after the last round of talks that raised the debt ceiling:

We lowered our long-term rating on the U.S. because we believe that the prolonged controversy over raising the statutory debt ceiling and the related fiscal policy debate indicate that further near-term progress containing the growth in public spending, especially on entitlements, or on reaching an agreement on raising revenues is less likely than we previously assumed and will remain a contentious and fitful process.

— Standard & Poor's, United States of America Long-Term Rating Lowered To 'AA+' On Political Risks And Rising Debt Burden; Outlook Negative, www.standardandpoors.com/ratingsdirect

Yes, Standard and Poor's didn't lower the government's credit rating because the debt ceiling was raised, but because of how the debt ceiling was raised. Much of the quality of debt rating has to do with the confidence a lender has about whether or not the debt will be repaid. Our leaders have just shaken the confidence straight out of our S&P's rating.

This is not a "Republican Thing" or a "Democrat Thing." It's not a "President Thing" and it's not a "Congress Thing." This is a pox on both of their houses. They have completely screwed the pooch, they have killed the goose that laid the golden egg. Welcome to the wonders that were Rome, Greece, and Britannia. We have no one to blame except for the leaders that put us there.

Is there a way out? As a child of God, I believe in redemption, there's a way out. Do I think it has to do with any of the Bozo's inside the beltway? Maybe that one Independent from Vermont, but anyone else, no.

So what do I say about voting next time? Vote against! Vote against incumbents everywhere! Start fresh and maybe we can get two solid years of governance in before the corporations begin to buy themselves a new set of politician.

"Vote 'No' on Politicians! It Won't Get Worse."

Government Cheese

"Government Cheese" written by Bob Walkenhorst and recorded by The Rainmakers.

This song was written in the early 1980's when one of the foods distributed to poor people was cheese, forever known as "Government Cheese." The song was an anthem to Reagan Conservatives and everyone else who though this was an absurd creation of the welfare state. The first verse goes like this:

Give a man a free house and he'll bust out the windows
Put his family on food stamps, now he's a big spender
no food on the table and the bills ain't paid
'Cause he spent it on cigarettes and P.G.A.
They'll turn us all into beggars 'cause they're easier to please
They're feeding our people that Government Cheese

As a liberal, it isn't my favorite in the catalog, but as someone with a lick of common sense I can't deny much of it. But there's also a final verse I want you to consider:

Give a man a free ticket on a dead end ride
And he'll climb in the back even though nobody's driving
Too goddamn lazy to crawl out of the wreck
And he'll rot there while he waits for the welfare check
Going to hell in a handbag, can't you see
I ain't gonna eat no Government Cheese

Here's my new point: Politicians, those who are nominally our leaders, are bought and sold by people who finance campaigns. Politicians need votes to get elected; getting elected takes money; money buys influence. Money buys influence.

Politicians have been given the ticket on the dead end ride of campaign finance and they aren't bothering to get out of the wreck because they keep getting their checks. This is why people in Washington don't change, they keep getting paid. In the end, the real difference between Republicans, Democrats, and Welfare Queens is the source of the check. What a bunch of hypocrites! Any way you slice it, they've all lined up to a teat and are feeding well while the rest of us are left to rot.

Good luck everyone. What we need is someone in government who will say, "I ain't gonna eat the corporate cheese." Until that happens, what we've seen for the last four weeks is going to be the beginning. I just pray it isn't the beginning of the end.

A Snarky Little Idea about the Football Lockout

I just saw a posting on Facebook from the Kansas City Chiefs about asking people to contribute to their Joplin Tornado Relief effort. Here's an idea: Pick 53 residents of Joplin, one for each spot on the roster, and have them pick a jersey belonging to a Chiefs player. On game day, the holder of that jersey gets that player's paycheck. Not the team, not the player, but a person whose life is devastated and doesn't have NFL football to help their lives feel even a little more normal.

New winners every week, one winner per household please. I think that would help more than me sending the Chiefs a case of water to send to Joplin.

Nope, Nothing Is Certain

In a letter to Jean-Baptiste Leroy on November 13, 1789 Ben Franklin wrote: Our new Constitution is now established, and has an appearance that promises permanency; but in this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death and taxes.

Well, guess what--Franklin was wrong!

For legal purposes, a corporation has the same rights as every individual person. But with government bailouts of "corporations too large to fail" there is now corporate immortality.

Also, there are corporations that do not pay corporate taxes. These are very big corporations too.

So we actually have individuals in this country that can't die and don't pay taxes. It looks like Franklin was wrong after all. I don't think he'd be happy with that.

Thanks to the Dollar General Store in Marshall, Texas

Today the church received a donation from the Dollar General Store on HWY 80 West in Marshall, Texas.  We received gift cards, bags, and candy which will go to people in the hospital and nursing homes.  We will also be able to use the gift to provide pastoral care not only to members but others who need uplifting.

We're not ending world hunger, we're not reaching world peace, but we're reaching out to people in Marshall and if we don't start there we won't ever be ready for the rest of the world.

Thanks again to Amy and all at Dollar General!  Thank you and thanks be to God!

The Official Ladder of NCAA Basketball

Today I learned that Werner Ladders is the official ladder of NCAA Basketball.  Werner even makes a nine foot tall model exclusively for NCAA Basketball.  Yes, the official height of a basketball rim is ten feet so a nine foot ladder is perfect.

I don't know what makes me shake my head harder, that the NCAA would sell the rights to be the official provider of ladders, that someone would want to be the official provider of ladders, or that this partnership has been going on since at least 2008.  It's a push.

Welcome to America where we'll sell just about anything.

Everybody Makes Mistakes

Everybody makes mistakes, it's a part of the human condition, it's the nature of sin.  So if everyone makes mistakes it's how you follow them up that makes all the difference.  Today is a good case in point.

The last few days I have had some challenging customer service moments.

Example 1: At Church's Chicken in Marshall I waited in the Drive-Thru, I waited longer than anyone would normally wait with nobody talking through the speaker too.  Finally I said, "Can someone take my order?"  I heard back, "Can you wait a minute?"  Hummm, no.  It was late, I hadn't had lunch, I was just going to order a snack, less than a buck and a half, but you know, I'm sharing this story so now you know too.

Example 2: At McDonalds (Marshall south end location) this morning I was at the Drive-Thru (notice a trend, my doctor would be pissed if she read my blog), I ordered, paid, picked up my order, and headed toward Dallas for a big meeting today.  I knew this would be my breakfast and lunch.  So I open my bag and look for my Bacon, Egg, and Cheese Biscuit.  What do I find?  Oatmeal.  (By the way, MickyD Oatmeal has almost as many calories as a cheeseburger, it ain't health food.)  Is that what I wanted?  No.  On top of no bacon it's hard to spoon oatmeal at 70 MPH.  So I go back, ask for the manager, and someone throws a bag of food in front of me taking the oatmeal.  They then turn their back to me and wish me a good day.  So I lost 15 minutes, drove about a buck to a buck and a half in gas, and was treated as if it happens all the time, but at least they're used to it.

Example 3: The computer I'm using right now is at the Hilton in University Park, Dallas.  (This is the conference hotel for the Grace Presbytery meeting.  Not real sure how I feel about that, but it is the closest hotel by a long shot.  More reasonably priced hotels would be so far away the savings would be a wash after driving expense.  So be it.)  This CPU was frozen so I called the front desk.  What happened next, someone apologized and fixed the computer.  Then they wished me a good evening.

The common thread, someone or something goofed up.  The uncommon thread, one of the three took care of me as a customer who was paying money for goods and service.  It's a attitude that is getting lost, and one that I surely appreciate still.  It's what I learned at a Baskin-Robbins in 1978 and still carry with me today.  It takes a little to learn and if you work in a service industry can take you a long way.

Oh, and if anyone wants to tell me that there's a big difference between McDonald's and the Hilton, I cannot and will not deny that.  So let me add that if you can't handle McDonald's, you aren't even going to get a chance at the Hilton.

It Works for Pro Wrestling...

I have heard commentators say that great players who want to play with other great players is good for the NBA.  They say that having several superstars concentrated on teams like Miami, New York, Chicago, Boston, LA (the Lakers of course, not the Clippers) is good for the game.  As for the little sisters, Charlotte, Toronto, Cleveland, Sacramento, Milwaukee--well, somebody's gotta lose every night so it might as well be these guys, right?

It seems like a business model right out of World Wrestling Entertainment.  Their business model talks about popular wrestlers who get a "push" to increase their popularity and ultimately popularity.  The guys they beat up all week long, they're called "jobbers" because they're just there to do a job, to make the stars look good.  They also call them "ham and eggers" because they'll never be able to afford steak and eggs.

Miami has been getting a push all season long.  Toronto, they're just doin' a job.

So tonight, as Chicago takes on Toronto, just remember those ham and eggs are supposed to taste good.  That's all the NBA thinks your team is worth.

My Beef Isn't with Taco Bell

This week there has been a big bru-ha-ha over Taco Bell Beef.  A group in California is suing the restaurant contending their taco meat is only 35% beef.

In response, the company has taken out full page advertisements in several large metropolitan newspapers saying their taco meat is 88% beef.

What upsets me is that the FDA benchmark for the amount of beef required to be in taco meat is only 40%.  I'm glad that someone is looking out for us.  Thank you FDA.