Loving Gesture

Five years ago or so, I took the "Pastoral Care in a Hospital Setting" class at Austin Presbyterian Theological Seminary. As a part of the class, Student Chaplains carried the St. David's Hospital Chaplain pager. Each night, one of the five of us in the class was on call. My first night with the pager, I got a call from the hospital. A man had died and it was my responsibility to be with the family and call the funeral home.

When I got there, a man was in the bed. On the other side of the bed, his grieving widow was in her wheelchair. Their daughter was with her mother. I don't remember if I said much of anything. One of the chief pastoral attitudes in this situation is that "it's better to silently feel foolish than to speak up and let everyone know."

I tried to be helpful, I did as the family asked. Again, this is often good pastoral care. But what struck me, what got me to my core was what the grieving woman did as she left. As her daughter was wheeling her out, the woman reached out and squeezed her husband's blanket covered toes.

That's it. A simple gesture that meant everything to her. "I love you," "I miss you," and a million other things were wrapped up in that little gesture, that tiny squeeze.

Do yourself a favor, before you go to bed tonight, grab your lover's feet, give them a squeeze, and even a little kiss if you want. If your lover asks what you're doing you can tell this story--or better yet--tell your own.